The ‘inbetweenness’ of who we are.
Got you there with ‘inbetweenness’?
Terrible word isn’t it?
But is a useful way of thinking about who
we are.
We usually identify ourselves by positive
statements that act as labels within categories. Thus I am male, 62, Caucasian,
an Australian citizen and resident, and who is a husband, father and
grandfather. The categories here are gender, age, race, citizenship and family.
Those words give an outward picture that
helps ‘place’ a person. (Of course, the order of those categories and the list
of what categories are included / excluded is quite revealing of the person doing
the classification.)
However, such categories often fail to
capture our reality. A while back I read a comment that has stayed with me and
which I find useful in self-understanding and in talking with others.
That’s the ‘inbetweenness’ bit.
As well as being described by what we are,
we can be described by what we are in-between.
Consider a person born in one country, who
has lived in two others during formative years and who studies in yet another
country. A label of political citizenship or residence makes a true statement
but fails to capture the cultural identity of that person. However, if we
describe that person as in the space between circles of varying sizes
representing each culture / country in their past and present, we gain a richer
and fuller picture.
I have found that an affirmation of ‘inbetweenness’
in identity is personally useful as I think about myself. For example, I can
bring my Australian heritage and 11.5 years in Singapore alongside one another.
Likewise with my pastor-teacher; teacher-pastor ministry identities.
What are you in-between?
A further thought.
If a person is only in-between, then that can be profoundly destabilising for
they are defined purely by what they are not. Talk about ‘hollow man’. On the
other hand, if someone has a strong inner core grounded in their being in God and
under Christ, then their inbetweenness can be a strong strength. This is a global
citizen: at home with and in God and therefore enabled to be at home anywhere
in his creation.
