I was a stranger and visited your church

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In the last several months I have been on the road. This includes visits to churches in Canada, Singapore, Thailand, England and Scotland.  These churches have been small and large; established and independent; and their services have been traditional, contemporary and more.  It has been a learning time on how to welcome visitors. I have seen it done well and poorly.

This reflection is written in the light of Hebrews 13:1-2. It is interesting that the first expression of brotherly love is to receive strangers well.  Behind these words there lies the old commands to care for strangers (eg Lev 19:34). Undergirding all this is the gospel grace wherein God shows hospitality to those who are strangers and even estranged from him (eg Rom 5:10). And finally, to welcome a stranger is akin to welcoming the Lord himself (Matt 25:35).

To you I am an unfamiliar face. It's not too hard to see that I am visiting as I may arrive well before the service or a little late. I don't walk in with familiar ease and may appear uncertain and tentative. I don’t know who sits where, what to do at different parts of the service, where the toilets are or what happens when the service ends. In short, I stand out from the regulars.

Who am I? I may be a committed believer who is passing through. Or a newcomer looking for a church home. Or I may be a local person enquiring about the faith. Or a desperate unbeliever seeking help and solace where I can find it. I may be on the edge of despair-driven suicide or it may be that walking into your service was a conscious choice to avoid a traveller’s temptation. Whoever I am and however long I stay, I am an opportunity for you to show God’s hospitality.

What to do:

• Give me a warm greeting as I enter, hand me any books or service sheets and help me find a seat (I didn’t know that seat was reserved for the elders!);
• Somewhere (handout, slide etc) tell me anything I need to know during the service, where the bathrooms are and any post-service arrangements ('behind the small hall’ is not a destination that I know);
• If you are sitting near me, say ‘hi’ and take an interest in me – take me over to the coffee venue and ask if you can help with information about the church or area;
• Have a welcoming team who watch out for visitors and assign someone of a similar demographic to link with me;
• Notice my name and use it when talking to me (I’ll try and do the same to you).

What not to do:

• Single me out during the service by asking visitors to identify themselves (I’m already uncertain about walking into your space);
• Come on strong with an overly heavy greeting and an evangelistic spiel when you first meet me (you don't know me yet);
• Try and sign me up for something unless I express interest (I don't like being pushed);
• Leave me standing by myself during coffee time (I’ll be the person lingering over the outdated notice board or bookstall or standing near the door).

If you don’t know what to do, just put yourself in my shoes. How do you like to be welcomed when you are the stranger and visitor?